dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
