I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
