I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
