Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
