That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
