im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize