I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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