I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.