This girl wants me to lick her pits
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner