its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
