Come see our sink grown plant.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
