Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
