this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
