Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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