i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
