don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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