If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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