well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
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Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
We just shotgunned beers for America
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
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A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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