If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
