Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
