Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
