she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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