Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
never play flip cup with pint glasses
My pussy is not your playground.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
