I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize