2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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