Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it