There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
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i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
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I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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