I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
