Just cropdusted the office
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
So much Jack, so little girl.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
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