im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
