BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Terrible idea I love it
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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