have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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