Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
