Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
