Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
