Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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