my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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