oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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