if you like me you must not know who I am
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize