I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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