Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
