Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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