You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
