New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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