Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
