My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
where does the pee come out of this thing
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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