You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
hell yes lets make some ravioli
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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