He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
