I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
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Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
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Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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