question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
