the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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