Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
