I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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