Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize