I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I think people are normalizing furries
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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